Embracing the Ordinary

    After a week of respite, the kids are all back.  Even though it was a welcome break from the hectic.  I missed them.  The week even seemed longer than usual.  Our summer routine of opening Popsicles, settling the occasional sibling argument, and drying wet swimsuits came to a halt.  For them it was a week of bonding between grandparent and grandchildren.  Fond memories of fishing, hiking, and swinging on the back porch until dark, will go with them for the rest of their life.  But I was so glad to see them running up the drive, arms open wide.

  Love these guys.  Holding onto everyday cause it's going by way too fast!

Enjoy the Meanwhile

     My two year old has recently began a nap strike. I don't understand why she would forego one of the greatest pleasures of my life.  I love sleep. My inability to sleep past 8:00 a.m. is one aspect of parenting that is most frustrating.  
Daily, I plead with her, "Quinn, do you want to take a nap?" 
She grins, not even looking up from her flutter of activity, "no." 
Fifteen to twenty minutes later, "Quinn, it's time to take a nap."
Now I have insulted her.  "NO!!" Her brow is furrowed and she storms off murmuring something in her native toddler speak. 
     So, I wait.  She has found a bag of clothes she and her sister have outgrown.  She puts the over-sized shirts on and wears the pants on her head.  I feign terror, "Oh no, it's the silly monster!" She finds it hilarious, pulling off her disguise revealing herself. We sing. She tells me to shush.  She is the star of this show.  Finally, I see her begin tire. She is fussy.  She grabs a paci and blanket and wants to be held. So we rock.  And rock. Until finally she surrenders.  Outside it is raining softly and the wind chimes play a beautiful tune.  I would probably be this successful more often if I wouldn't push.  Another metaphor for so many things.  Don't push, just surrender, and enjoy the meanwhile.

Thoughts between Loads of Laundry

   Let's face it motherhood is a thankless job.  If you were to work a similar job outside the home under the same conditions how long would you tolerate it?  A day? A week?  Some days your employees (your children) are insubordinate.  They willfully disobey you and then try to pass the blame to a fellow employee, manipulate you by appealing to your sympathies, or have the audacity to challenge your authority.  To an outsider, it would appear they are trying to undermine you.  You work so hard at your tasks, and then they sabotage your efforts by their careless actions.  A mopped floor shows the tracks of muddy shoes minutes after it dries.  A load of laundry is ruined due to a rogue crayon in the pockets.   Cleaned window panes display sticky fingers.  What a hostile work environment!  And as the manager you have no firing power.  Talk about a good union.
    If my twenty-one year old self  were to look at her thirty-five year old self, as Scrooge was able to look at what lay ahead in his lifetime, she may be pleading to the Ghost of Christmas future, "I'm sorry! What must I do to make amends!"  But thank goodness every minute of motherhood is not punishing.  For one thing my children are full of pleasant surprises.  My two year old is very into grooming.  She loves combing her hair, brushing her teeth, putting on deodorant (on her belly), and as I discovered his morning washing her hands in the bathtub.  My son is infinitely considerate.  Yesterday after receiving a belated birthday present from his grandmother, he offered to give it to his slightly older sister who was feeling a little left out.  Then my oldest is ever obedient.  She is always helpful and rarely complains when asked to pitch in.
     Those times when our children are difficult, I wonder how often I try my heavenly father's patience.  He poured out just enough grace to me so that even though I was a sinner, he loved me and made me one of his own (Rom 5:8, Eph. 1:5).  As a Christian, I know how I should behave, but like a stubborn child, at times I  want my will for my way rather than my loving father's will (Eze. 36:26; Jere. 29:11).  The only way to understand the plans He has in store for us is to talk to him. I am continually amazed at God's willingness to reveal himself to me. Despite my circumstances, in good and bad, the Lord is with me (Psalm 139).  But we have to seek Him and constantly work to better the lines of communication with God and deepen our relationship with Him.

                                         

Epidurals...Making an Informed Decision

  Earlier in the week, between planning our church's annual bible school, picking up spilled Cheerios, and wondering where my sanity went, I had the opportunity to view a video segment re: one person's uninformed opinion about epidurals.  I am referring to actress-comedienne, Ali Wentworth's reaction to Victoria's Secret model, Miranda Kerr's decision not to have an epidural because she did not want her baby "drugged up." Ms. Wentworth responded that her babies were not drugged and how dare she! As a childbirth educator I cringe at public personalities further disseminating misinformation.  

   There is some debate on whether drugs used in epidural anesthesia crosses the placenta .  This is largely due to the type of anesthesia administered.  But many women are uniformed or misinformed by their health care professionals when making a decision about receiving an epidural.  To flippantly say, "an epidural won't affect your baby," is WRONG.

      Studies show that epidurals can have the following implications:

• Increased need to augment birth with Pitocin;

• Increased maternal risk of low blood pressure while using epidural;

• Decreased spontaneous birth;

• Increased risk your baby will be evaluated for infection and receive antibiotics;

• Increase risk your baby will be jaundiced.

• fetal malpresentation (meaning baby is not in a good position);

• breathing problems in the baby immediately after birth;

• babies scoring lower on the Neonatal Behavioral Assessment Scale (NBAS)

      For some women, the risks of these complications are risks they can live with.  And often the fear of losing control, and enter the unknown are too much to bear.  Too often by failing to educate and inform we fail to empower birthing women. There is nothing more powerful to a woman who will give birth in their life, than the realization that she can learn to dance with the power of her contractions and discover the depth of her strength.